The Swinger

Love,
Everybody told me how you were no good but I did not listen. I was never the type to go on other people's opinions about who I date. I took a risk on you because I saw your potential but potential means nothing if you can't see it in yourself. I love you for the person you are and not for the things we do together. I remember how people you used to approach me, telling me where they saw you and who you were with. How they think you are up to no good and all that. Yeah, I stood there and listened intuitively as to not give them any inclination that I knew what was going on as if you hadn't already told me where you were and what you were doing and who you were with. I never let them know that because I didn't feel that it was any of their business. The type of relationship that you and I have is between you and me. I don't think anyone would understand. That is why I always acted surprised and in shock and disbelief when friends and family would approach me with things like that. I don't know, maybe apart of me didn't want people to know that I was actually okay with what you were doing. I picked fights with you in public just to throw everyone off the trail. I thought that letting them believe you were cheating on me was far more acceptable than us having an open relationship. I did not want anyone to know that our special relationship involved other people. I guess part of me feels a bit ashamed about it because I was raised to respect commitment and faithfulness. I think I have allowed you to think I am okay with it, when deep down I'm really not. I had hoped that once you see me with another guy, you would think twice about the arrangement and want to be faithful-that never happened!
But, because I loved you and didn't want to lose you, I did what you asked because I know that having an open relationship is what you wanted. You said it would work as long as we were open and honest and communicated with one another. The rules were that you We would have to meet each others friend and If we liked them then we could date them. If I liked your female friend then you could date her, and if you liked my guy friend I could date him. We were not supposed to form intimate connections with them, just sex. For me, this agreement was a little weird at first but I eventually got into the swing of things. But, I never expected that I would fall in love with another man! His name is Josh and he really wants to be with me and ONLY me! We share all the same values about love and commitment. You know, the values I discarded once I started dating you! Josh want marriage and children and  I know that is something you don't want right now. I'm not getting any older and I can't keep lying to my friends and family about our relationship. Josh asked me to marry him last night  and I told him I would think about it, because I was considering you. But I don't see a future with us the way I see one with him. So, I am going to tell him yes, but I wanted to let you know before I do so.
To be honest, I never really wanted an open relationship, I just did it because you wanted it. But in a way, I'm glad I did it because it led me to Josh! So, in a way you brought us together! Thank you, and good luck with your life! -By the time you read this I would have already moved out, so no need to try to contact me because I changed my phone number! Best of luck to ya!