My Husband Is:

My husband is my best friend. We go everywhere together. We goof around a lot because our jobs are so serious and demanding. He like going out of town on expensive trips to Vegas, Europe, and Hawaii. I Loved Hawaii (that is where we spent our honeymoon). I took him fishing and camping. It was so much fun but what I love the most is when we would sit outside and count the stars together and he would tell me his inner most thoughts as I lay my head on his chest. He sings to me  and I love to hear it even if it is off key.
We visit his parents and he never disrespects me when his old girlfriend comes to visit. I love him so much!
I don't even remember what it was like  when he wasn't in my life. I hate arguing with him and he knows it because he picks his battles, however, I give in to whatever he wants most of the time. My husband keeps me on track. I am not the most focused person, but he is and he is very organized. He likes a really clean house so I call a maid service because I can't keep it as clean as he likes it but I do clean up a little. Our home is so huge and we are barely there through out the day. When we are home, we like to cook together. My husband is a great cook. I usually help out by making the salads and side items. He makes the main courses and desserts! He is so sexy in the kitchen. I am so attracted to him and he can't keep his hands off me. I he tells me everyday that I love him the way he wants me to love him and that makes me smile. I also tell him that he loves me right whenever he loves me the way I want him to because I need him to know what makes me smile. But, knowing that I am loving him the way he wants me to gives me the greatest joy in the world!

Just Keeping It Real

I'm a single woman in my prime! I have my own job, own my own house, pay my own bills. I am the quintessential independent woman. I provide for everything I need and want. From My head down to the soles of my feet, everything about me is store bought! I don't fake the funk. I keep it real with mine. I wear wigs not because my hair is short but because I want to try something different. Each wig/weave that I wear have a different name and they have different eye colors that I wear to go with them. On Wednesday nights, I'm wearing the blonde wig with blue eyes, so I'm Brenda for the night. On Thursday nights I wear my Sasha wig, with hazel contacts! Sasha gets the most attention. She is the party girl and I let loose whenever I become her!  I love going out and portraying a different persona because it gives me a sense of adventure and adds passion to my life. However, I am starting to realize that the relationships I make don' t last very long. Every guy I meet seems to be  hiding something or keeping some sort of secret that usually gets revealed around the third or sixth month of dating. All most all of those secrets are deal breakers. I had one guy tell me he was 35, Single, with one child. He was 35, he was single, but he was living with his girlfriend that was pregnant with his one child! We dated for about three months before I suggested we stop meeting at the club and start going out on real dates. One night he asked me to pick him up from  what he said was his house, I arrived a little early only to see him kissing a pregnant woman two houses down from where he had me drop him off! I slowed down just enough for him to see that it was me as I sped off! I never talked to him again.
I dated this other guy who posed as a published author who was always working on a project.  He would always plan to spend time with me only to cancel, because he wanted to write and finish his book. Come to find out, he was never published, and he just says that to make himself seem more interesting than what he really was, a pizza delivery guy! But my favorite was Tonell. Tonell was fine! He had abs on top of abs, 6'4 201 lbs of sheer muscle! Personal Trainer by day, and Sex Machine by night! Whew!!  Tonell had it all, good looks, a thriving business, and swag! Tonell would always talk about being spiritual and how God was living within him. I just thought he was filled with the Holy Spirit! This dude actually thought he was the decendant of Zeus, the roman god! Yeah he sold me the dream, and let me down. It took me a while to get over the fact that this seemingly well to do guy was a weirdo!
After Tonell, I decided to take a break on dating altogether and really figure out what I was doing wrong. It wasn't long before I realized the problem was not with them but with me and the image I was portraying. If I wanted to attract a REAL man, I had to be a REAL WOMAN!  With all of my fake hair, fake nails, fake eye lashes, fake eyes, breast implants, tummy tucks, and butt implants, no wonder I was confused and to why I couldn't find a real man. Hell, even my personality was fake! Subconsciously I created different personalities because I was afraid to show the real me because of the fear of not being accepted. The guys that were attracted to the fakeness, were fake themselves. In order for me to attract the type of guy I want, I had to be the type of woman I am which is me. But, I had gotten so caught up in the illusion, that I forgot who I really was. I just want to be normal.  Its seems like normalcy is a dying breed! Not a whole lot of normal people out there anymore. Too many people want to show off how intelligent they are, or how much stuff they have (Me!) . Why complicate the simple?? Just be you, and allow people to make up their own mind about you and stop trying so hard to get people to see you as this or that! I swear, getting to know someone is like peeling onions! Just when you thought you had broken through, you got another layer to deal with causing you tears. I've done my fair share of crying and I refuse to cry  especially over something I can change. I'm going to be the change, I want to see in this world! Less weirdness, and more NORMAL!

Caught Between Some Soft Rocks & One Ridiculously Hard Place

As I was doing your laundry I came across this note that was stuffed in your front pocket:

I never thought this day would come. We did it! We finally got married but not to each other. I never thought I would find love again after you and I parted ways. I never thought I would ever allow a man to come into my life and sweep me off my feet like the man I married. I always pictured you and I at the alter, confessing our love to one another.Deep down I still feel that way. Even though you and I have gotten involved with someone else, it never stopped us from being together. The love we have transcends marriage and time. We grow apart but some how we find each other again. To the rest of the world, we are just two people who can't stay committed  but you and I both know the truth. There is just some things your wife can't give you that you need  because you can only get it from me. There are some things my husband can't give me that I need that can only come from you. But where we go lacking, my husband and your wife more than makes up for it! Our lives are  and will forever be entangled in this foursome. Sometimes I look at my husband and wonder if he really know what I am doing and when will he ever find out that there really is no such thing as a Church Family Retreat. I just tell him that because I know he hates to travel and he hates to go near church people. Its a great cover for our romantic getaways! I wonder does your wife know about your camping trips? She hates the wilderness and the bugs and she would much rather let you go with your buddies, but the only buddy you are with is me. I love you and look forward to our vacation together

YOURS FOREVER, 

Lovely. 

I can't even get mad at you. I can only get mad at myself. When people, strangers that I have never even met, started to come up to me and tell me about your affairs, I stood by you. You told me that they were just jealous and that they needed to just mind their own business. I did, I believed you because you are good father, and a great provider for our family. But money isn't everything. And now that I see you for who you are, I can't really give you that title of provider because it looks as though God has been keeping us afloat for this long. While you have been gallivanting the streets with this other woman, I have been in the church praying for our family. But every time I pray, someone comes to tell me something about you that you ain't doing right! I knew about your fishing trips, the hotel stays, the weekend in Barcelona! I even know where she lives, in fact, I've even sat down with her husband and had really long chat about the both of you all! Do we know what you are doing? Hell yeah we know, and we have known for  a while now. At first, I didn't want to leave you because I thought that it would be an embarrassment to the family to get a divorce, but from the looks of things, we have no marriage. You spend more time with her than you do with me. Hell, I spend more time talking with her husband than she does! So you go ahead and do what you have to do. I'm not mad, I'm just mad at myself for not seeing this sooner. When you get back from your "camping trip" Me and Tyler will be long gone. Don't bother to look for us either! By the way, Tyler is not your son, I just told you that so you would marry me! MY MISTAKE!!

Teen Spirit: The All-American Teenager

I'm 16 years old and I am in my prime. I'm on the cheer squad at my high school, I babysit my nieces and nephews during the summer so I make my own money. That's how I can afford my trendy school clothes. Everyone admires me and wants to be me. I was voted most popular 2 years in a row and next year I am in the running for most likely to succeed. I am the All-American Teenager. My boyfriend, Sean,  is the captain of the Football team and just happens to be the Quarterback. He is so handsome. When we graduate high school we plan to go to the same college, preferably where ever he gets a scholarship. My parents are hardworking people they know I am smart and very responsible so they don't have to worry about me. They are both Lawyers so their work hours are very long.  So, I spend the majority of my  time at my boyfriend's house.
His mother is a stay at home mom so she is always there. He is the oldest of three. Usually we just go up to his room. His mom is so busy with the younger children, she never bother with us and sometimes she never realizes we are up there. My parents are thrilled that his mom is home all the time, so whenever they call my cell phone to check up on me, I tell them I am with Sean and his mom. I guess that gives them the sense that we are being chaperoned but that can't be further from the truth!
Sean and I have been together since freshman year. Things haven't really gotten hot and heavy between us until he became really good at throwing a football. He had never really pressured me into having sex before. Lately, now that he got all this attention and popularity, girls have been secretly writing him letters, leaving their panties in his locker, and even running up to him after practice giving him their phone numbers. The guys in the locker room tease him on how faithful he is to me. They say he should  date as many girls as he can. I know this because Sean tells me everything. We are best friends, however, I think he told me too much because I had been feeling like I had to compete for his affection with those other girls.
I'm not sure if he had sex with any of those other girls, but I heard one girl in the locker room after cheer practice say that she and Sean had hooked up. Of course I confronted him about it and he told me, that he wasn't getting it from me, so why shouldn't he do it with someone who really loves him. I was so upset with him for a week, and there had been rumors that we had broken up.  So, I had decided to have sex with him. The first time we did it was totally awkward and it hurt like hell, and I remember not ever wanting to do it again. I thought it was suppose to be pleasurable but it wasn't, not at all! All I felt was embarrassed. A few days afterwards, we didn't speak to each other. We just stared at each other in the halls. But never spoke. A month after that, he was dating someone else. By that time I had gotten really sick. I kept throwing up every morning, so I stopped going to school. I had my mom write a note that I had a stomach virus. I couldn't keep anything down for a week. But it subsided and I started going back to school and started back going to cheer practice. Well, I went to try on my cheer squad uniform and it wouldn't fit! I was mortified and totally embarrassed. I got on the scale and I had gained ten pounds. I had to sit this game out because we didn't have any extra uniforms that fit me. Some of the girls on the squad started laughing and one of them said, " I sure hope you aren't preggo!"
Pregnant????? Me? Never! I'm not pregnant. Me and Sean had broken up and besides, I 'm 16 years old! I can't be pregnant! What would my parents think? How will I go to college? Besides, Sean and I only did it once and it was horrible so, anything that painful couldn't be enough to make a baby! But, I had to be sure. So I went to the free clinic on the down trodden side of town. I gave a fake name and they gave me a pregnancy test! POSITIVE!!!! At that moment, my life as I knew it was over.
I couldn't bare the thought of having my parents find out that their perfect daughter had gotten knocked up by her loser boyfriend, so I began to hide my pregnancy. My parents were gone so much that they never noticed. Whenever I had a problem, I would just go down to that free clinic. They gave me vitamins and brochures of adoption agencies, but I just threw them away. Well, one night I began to have pain and I went to the bathroom, it felt like I had to go really bad, so I strained and pushed! I saw blood coming out! Thank God my parents were out on one of their dinner parties because I screamed so loud, I'm surprised I didn't wake up the neighbors. I felt something coming out of me. And it fell into the toilet! It was a baby! I remember seeing a show about babies that you had to cut the umbilical cord so I grabbed the baby, got some scissors and cut the cord, and tied it off with my cheer scrunchie! It was a boy! I shook it to see if he was a live, and he started to cry. I reached for some sheets and wrapped him up in them.
I layed him on the bed while I tried to clean up the mess I had made in the bathroom. I took a shower, cleaned myself up, grabbed the baby and took him to Sean's house. I couldn't bare to see the look on my mother's face if she knew I had a baby. When I got to Sean's house I realized that I never told him that I had his baby. He doesn't know. I left the baby on their doorstep, rang the door bell, and hid in the bushes to see who answered the door. It was his mother! The baby lay crying at the door, she looked down and screamed for Sean! " Call 9-1-1, someone left a baby on the doorstep! Oh My God!".
When she said that, I ran home as fast as I could. I only lived a block away. By the time my parents got home, I had been in bed. For a week I stayed home. Then after two weeks I went back to school.
When I see Sean, he runs up to me, "Hey, you wouldn't believe what happened two weeks ago! Someone left a baby at our house!" I acted surprised! He went on to say that his parents are thinking of adopting the child as their own, because they were trying to conceive another child but were unable to. " My mom thinks it was a sign from God, so she is going to keep him! Now I have a baby brother!" I looked at him, smiled and walked away before I told him the truth! If he only knew that the baby brother he was so excited about was his son!

You Are Stronger Than The Weakness You Have Settled For

 When I want something, I go after it until I  get it and at the time, that something was a man. I pursued a man any and every where. I was desperate. I looked on the internet, I went looking in the clubs, in the malls, and even on the street corners. I would put on the tightest dress, the highest of heels and the longest of weaves just to grab the attention of someone who thought I was their dream girl. I wanted to look the part of the dream. Not realizing that a dream is just that, a dream. I didn't know that there was any value to be being real. After all, I believed the lie that all men want a fantasy girl because those were the most desirable. So that is what I became. I sold my car to get breast implants, took out two five thousand dollar loans to get a nose job and a tummy tuck just so I can look like those video models you see on the music videos. I did all that just so I could look good enough to get into the clubs where the RICH men would party, hoping to snag one. When I finally did, i was so excited. He was  a very prestigious music mogul. He had dollars upon dollars upon dollar and he would spend it all on me. We would go on shopping sprees at Marc Jacob's Jewelers and he would buy me the most beautiful diamond necklaces. We would  go Lamborghini shopping and he would rent me out one for my birthday just so I can show off to all my friends. He was everything I wanted. But with all the fancy dining and extravagant trips I began to fall off on the maintenance, he noticed and soon he stopped calling me and inviting me places. I would call him and he wouldn't answer my phone calls. The last time I called him, the phone was no longer in service But that didn't stop his entourage to start calling on me. I was so obsessed with this man that I would do anything to be in his company. I would date his bodyguard just to be in the same club as him. I would ask about him so much that everyone began to be afraid of me so they wouldn't let me into any more of the same clubs he would frequent. It wasn't until I was standing in line waiting to get into this club that I used to be able to get into with no problem,  and saw him pull up in the same pink Lamborghini that he had bought for me with some other woman,  I realized  it was over. She was drop dead beautiful, and young. I became depressed and started eating more.The tummy tuck become not so tucked, the boob job I got began to leak, and my clothes became last seasons, and were no longer valuable.
When someone shows you who they are believe them, and when you see someone showing themselves to a person and that person believes something other than what is being seen, then that person is living in deception. My mama always told me that you can't make nobody love you, and you can't change someone just by loving them because your human love is not strong enough. People need the kind of Love that only God can give. People need a stronger love than whats is humanly possible. Anything other than that is just mental confusion, and like my grandmother used to say, "Baby, don't be confused, because confusion is of the Devil. Be certain of your decisions and lay hold to them like your life depended on it because it does."

My mind has played a few tricks on me through out the years because I thought that if I loved a man then that was all that was needed. If he didn't love me back then that was okay because I had enough love for the both of us. So when when he showed me who he was, I chose not to believe and eventually, I was back to square one. But this time, I was worse than I was when I first met him. 
I had become so confused and questioned who I was and where I was going in my life. At one point I had almost considered ending my own life. because my dream of being the 'dream girl' became a nightmare! I had no money and no man to fix my problems. I had to move back home just so I could live until I could find a job to support myself. Unfortunately for me, I had gotten pregnant, by the bodyguard, and by the time I found out, he was no where to be found. So now I have to raise this child on my own.
 I realized that I had wasted half my life on chasing something that wasn't real. It was an image. I wanted the image of love and became seduced by the glamor of it all. In fact, It was the idea of love the intrigued me the most. The idea of someone coming into my life and whisking me of to a wonderful world of perfection. So, instead of trying to find a man, I decided to try and find out who I was and why I was so ready to do ANYTHING to be with man.I discovered that it wasn't the man that I was looking for. It was fear of being alone. I began to read more  about loneliness and I developed a love for psychology. Which lead to  me wanting to go to school to become a relationship therapist because until you deal with the fear of loneliness, you can't really form healthy loving relationships.

To all the lonely people in the world looking for comfort:
You are stronger than the weakness that u have settled for!...your strength comes from God!...Although u may not WANT to raise the children on your own, or live all alone, or take an opportunity that will drastically change your life ultimately leaving you desolate and alone... maybe it is what you NEED to do so GOD can show you who you really are!

Never Should Have Listened To Mama

To My Husband,
Damn. It is true what they say about when you are dying your life flashes before your eyes. But, not in the way you think. Right now, as I am gasping for air and my breathing is slowing and as the lights are getting dim in the room around me, I have only thoughts of what could have been. I have only thoughts of what I should have done. I have only thoughts of what everyone will think when they learn the truth about the way that I died. My mom, my friends, my child. Have a left them anything at all? What kind of legacy did I set up for them? Will My baby be taken care of? Gasping, but there is no air coming in or out. Darkness settles upon my eyes. I feel no pain. I hear nothing, and I see nothing. All I have is regret.
I never should have married you. You and I were too young but we thought we were in love. Back then I thought if you were jealous, that meant that you loved me. I enjoyed being your possession. "You are MY girl!" you would say. That made me feel wanted . Sometimes when I felt  unappreciated, I would do things to make you jealous just to see if you still cared. Remember that one night when Trish and I went to the movies and I stayed out all night? It was right after you and I first moved in together. You called me like 50 times that night wanting to know where I was. We got a kick out of that too! I was even bragging to my home girls about how sprung I had you. But when I got home you showed me a thing or two. I remember walking through the door and you jumped from behind the couch, grabbing me by the throat and pushed me up against the wall, asking me over and over where the hell I was. That was the first time you ever laid hands on me. I thought about leaving you then, but my mother advised against it. She said you were a good man and that I brought it on myself for being out all night. Besides, I had to think about the baby. I wanted a two parent household and I knew I couldn't raise Malachi alone. You weren't his father but you were the closest thing he had to one and I wasn't going to take that from him.
I stayed with you another 2 years before you found work but by then , you had become a pot head. By our third year of living together, you asked me to marry you. I remember that because you came home after a night of bowling with your friends at work sloppy drunk, falling onto the couch yelling my name asking me to marry you. I said yes, but by morning you didn't remember a thing. I was so hurt, I just didn't come home at all for 2 weeks. I took Malachi and we stayed at my mom's house. Again, she thought I was crazy and warned me to go back. She said, "Girl, you are messing up! What kind of man will help you raise a child that is not his own? A GOOD ONE that's what! So you better go and make things right before he got some other woman laying in your bed and eating up them groceries he bringing home!" She was right! I didn't want no other woman living in my home, so I came back. That following year, you and I got married at the court house.
I thought things would improve when we got married. I thought that once you knew we were together forever that you wouldn't get jealous anymore because, as I had gotten older, I realized that your jealousy was not fun anymore, but very painful and often came with bruises. But I justified it by saying you only hit me when you were drunk. When you were sober, you were great! But after we had gotten married, you began to drink more and more. Every time you would come home from a night out, you would swear up and down that I was cheating on you. We would argue so much that the neighbors would call the cops. But they would just make you leave until you sobered up. You would just come right back, and I would take you back because I loved you and I thought I couldn't do any better.
For a while things had become mellow. There was no fighting, but there was no communication either. I had gotten to the point where I just couldn't talk to you or be around you anymore. So I decided to leave you. After you got home from work, I sat you down and told you why I was unhappy and that I needed my space and some time to think if I really want to be married. I remember because you were sober. You agreed, so I grabbed Malachi and went to a friend's house instead of going to my mother's house because she always gave me bad advice when dealing with you. I was tired of being beaten and abused. I just wanted out! I called my mother to tell her where I would be just in case she needed me. I never should have told her anything because I guess you called her looking for me in your drunken state and she told you where I was. You showed up at the front door with your father's hunting rifle he gave you when you were 10, Screaming! You shot the lock of the front door, and before I knew anything, I was lying in a pool of my own blood. Gasping. Gurgling. Struggling to breathe! As I lay dying, I hear another shot, I turn, and I see Malachi running toward me! Crying! "Moooommmmmmaaaaa!!!!" I faintly hear a thud, and see your lifeless body hit the hardwood floor! Everything is getting dark. Malachi's screams becomes faint as if fading into the background. All I can think about as I lay here dying is, Damn. I never should have listened to my Mama!

Happily Never After: The Relationship Between Cinderella and Peter Pan

How can a relationship between Cinderella and Peter Pan workout?  Peter Pan refuses to grow up and be a Prince Charming. Cinderella wants her happily ever after, but there is always drama. Peter wants to hang out with the Lost Boys! Cinderella thinks that the Lost Boys are a waste of his time. The time he spends with those Boys, he could be out working. 

Peter Pan is frustrated because Cinderella has so many shoes that she loses her glass slippers. Peter doesn't want to get a job. He just wants to play basketball with the Lost Boys. Peter hates to work because that means he has to grow up. Peter is 35 years old. Instead, wants to be taken care of and is looking for a Wendy. Cinderella is 30 and has to scrub floors, cook, clean chimneys and is waiting on the day where her Prince will rescue her from her life of hardship. This is their story...

 

Cinderella is a victim of circumstance. She is a single woman, who just can't seem to get it together. No matter how hard she works, she just can't seem to find the life she wants. She is a dreamer who reads the latest romance novels and thinks her life should be a Romantic Comedy and that there is a Prince Charming out there looking for her. She holds on to the hope by reading her bible daily and her favorite scripture is the verse "... man who findeth a wife, findeth a good thing.." . She holds on to that word so much that she never goes anywhere. She stays home on her off days from grueling days at work. She cuts out pictures of wedding dresses from her favorite magazines and she knows just what her husband will look like. Handsome, Tall, and dark. She never goes out on dates, or anywhere for that matter. She just sits at home and waits for her Prince to rescue her from her boring mundane life.

Peter Pan is a victim of himself. He is a single man with lots of dreams but lacks the focus it takes to see them through. So he dabbles in a bit of everything. He calls himself a jack of all trades. His main focus is to have a good time. He used to be a high school basketball star, which is his only claim to fame. He loves to live close to home because people still remember him in his glory days. He is the type guy that loves to play the love game but never really wants to settle down, not for real. He just tells the women that just so he can get them in bed. Every relationship he gets into never really lasts as long as his high school sweetheart because that was when he thought he was at his best. Instead, he chases the past by hanging out with the Lost Boys reminiscing on the good old days and playing basketball at the local parks. Even though he is in his thirties, he still feels like he isn't ready to settle down into a committed relationship. He can't keep a job long enough to provide for a family because he hates to work. Peter's dream is to have family where he is the stay at home father so he can play games with his kids and never have to work. Peter is looking for a caretaker, someone who can take care of him. Peter wants a  mommy.

Well, one day Cinderella decides to take her co worker's advice and try online dating. Cinderella works so much that she has no time for dating. Well, she comes across Peter, who is also trying online dating, but only as a prank. He has no intentions of finding love, he just created a profile for shits and giggles! Actually one of the Lost Boys created the list for him. Well, they both get to talking, and Peter decides to go out with her because she has a great job with benefits. Meanwhile Cinderella is excited because Peter is very charming and handsome and he wants to spend time with her.
They meet, and Peter decides he likes what he sees! He then becomes interested in getting to know her better. They decide to start dating. Well, as time goes on Cinderella is really starting to fall for Peter, so she brings up the subject of commitment. After all, Cinderella is on a time clock. She wants to have three children before she turns thirty five. 
Well, at first, Peter is hesitant about getting in a relationship, but after a few more dates, he gives in. Besides, Cinderella is not giving up the goods unless he commits to her and he has been single for a while. So they decide to make it official and they started to live happily ever after up until she meets the lost boys. The Lost Boys are a group of guys that Peter hangs out with. They are his inner circle of close friends that he has known his entire life. They are also rowdy, obnoxious and rude. They had no manners and they did not show her any respect.
 Most of all, Cinderella wanted a Prince, and what she got was a frog whenever Peter would hang out with the Lost Boys. Cinderella brought it to Peter's attention but Peter loved the Boys. They were his friends and he didn't feel like he had to choose. Cinderella was confused because her Prince Charming was suppose to choose her over everyone else. But that didn't happen. The more time Peter spent with the Lost Boys, the further apart they became. All of a sudden Peter decides to call it quits because he realized that he really never wanted to be with Cinderella in the first place. He missed Wendy, his high school sweetheart and nothing or no one compared to her because Wendy loved the Lost Boys. She read them stories, washed their clothes and even played with them whenever she visited. Plus, Cinderella was too needy, expensive and sucked up all of his space!  So they parted ways. Peter  is still searching for his Wendy, and Cinderella  is still waiting on her Prince Charming.

Which character type are you, Cinderella, Wendy, Peter Pan or Prince Charming?